Addiction is a very difficult thing to overcome. And despite what you might think, there are people who have trouble overcoming those addictions. The pull is too great. And they need help.
For this reason, there are organizations where people can go and work with the support of others who battle those very same addictions. It’s not easy. It takes a lot of will power and commitment and trust – both giving and taking of trust.
Do you know how many people out there are struggling every single day, every single moment with the urge to light up another cigarette? Or the urge to open another can of beer? Or to take that last $50 in their pocket and road-trip to Atlantic City with it?
It’s the hardest choice for them.
I have friends who battle these demons every second of their lives. They understand how important it is for everybody in their lives, they understand what it means to not fall back into that lifestyle… but they also know how tempting it is to do so.
And for them, it often means making difficult life choices. Choices that include avoiding a restaurant that even serves mixed drinks – isolation to avoid temptation, so to say. But it’s what they have to do to survive. It’s their protection, it’s their defense. Respect it.
Trust me. Nobody’s perfect. Myself least of all. But if I know someone is having a tough time, I’ll be the designated driver. I have no problem driving a friend home who’s so blackout drunk, that person couldn’t count to three if you spotted one and two. For me, it’s not, “Go get some help,” it’s “What can I do to help?”
This is the toughest part. People are embarrassed when situations like this occur. They’re already at their lowest. They don’t need the additional shame of a perception of deficiency or inadequacy.
It’s at that exact moment that you must step up and say, “I’m here for you. Whatever you need, whatever you don’t need, call me. I will be your rock, I will be your support. No judgments, no sermons. Together, we can make this a better day.”
And that’s what you do. That’s why support groups have sponsors to call if you’re feeling conflicted. It’s help. It’s not judgment.
There’s also other addictions – addictions of staying in a relationship with an abusive partner, because you don’t know of any other outlet. You think if that person leaves you, you will have nothing, and staying with the abuser in your mind is better than being alone.
No. Never think that. Don’t ever think that.
It’s in those instances that if you can’t find the strength to walk away, that others will find the strength and help you walk away. Friends, neighbors, clergy, law enforcement, support groups, all of them.
I’ve seen these relationships. Sometimes I’ve seen them first-hand. And it’s frightening.
It’s easy to say, “That person should just walk away. Get the keys in the car and drive until they’re away from that situation.”
That’s easy to say. It’s not easy to do.
And in those situations, offering help is more important than offering judgment. If someone’s drowning, you don’t scream at them to swim harder. You reach over and grab their hand and pull them to safety.
Even in the worst days, there is hope.
You can be that hope.
You must become that hope.
And you need to share that hope.
Because if you can do that for someone who’s run out of choices…
Someone will certainly do that for you when you’re trapped in a corner.
Be the sunlight.
And let your compassion shine.
Chuck The Writer 