Every time I think Lauren Boebert’s shelf life has finally dried up, the Colorado Congresswoman continues to fester like a boil.
Let me explain.
She barely won re-election in 2022 by a margin of less than 600 votes, and her 2022 opponent, Adam Frisch, looks to eclipse her in the 2024 general election. And considering Lauren Boebert’s most recognizable acts as a Congresswoman have been to offer empty “thoughts and prayers” after mass shootings – oh yeah, and that pole-polishing thing she did in a theater earlier this summer – I had thought that she would either get voted out of Congress, or simply leave and crawl back under the rock from whence she came.
No. She decided on a new tactic.
After four years of (sorta) representing Colorado’s 3rd District, Lauren Boebert has announced that she will now run instead for Congress in Colorado’s 4th District, hoping to take the seat that will be vacated by Congressman Ken Buck. CO-4 is on the other side of the state, and its voters more strongly favor the Republican Party.
I should note that she doesn’t have to relocate to CO-4, in that as long as one lives within the state of Colorado, one can run for any of its House seats. And since she knows that Adam Frisch is coming for her CO-3 seat, she’s packing up her thoughts and prayers and relocating her campaign to the other side of Colorado.
Yeah, why should you stay and represent the people who, oh, I don’t know, not only voted you into office, but barely kept you there for another term – but instead, you’re going to essentially move to a more advantageous locale in the hopes of keeping that sweet, sweet Congressional enrollment, no matter what?
See, it was NEVER about supporting people in her district. It was all about getting in office AND STAYING THERE, by any means necessary.
And there’s an old term for someone who tries to exploit such conditions for their own personal gain. That person is pejoratively known as a carpetbagger. Carpetbaggers were post-Civil War Republicans who moved to the South to gain political office and exploit the economic instability of the region for their own personal gain.
Hmm … seems familiar to the moment.
So Lauren Boebert can take her caustic personality and her divisive agenda and try to save her political career by essentially gaming the system to her advantage.
Which, as I said before, is proof that the only person Lauren Boebert supports in Congress is Lauren Boebert herself.
And maybe somewhere she’s got a suitcase made of high-quality shag.
Chuck The Writer 
Speaking of thoughts and prayers, I’m reminded of how much it truly irritates me to see people write “sending thoughts and prayers” on social media, especially Facebook. Before I moved to Vermont, I lived in Schoharie County, New York, where the local Facebook group acted as a countywide fire wire, announcing and discussing fire calls. The comments were often flooded with people sending thoughts and prayers, complete with the praying hands emoji.
To me, saying you’re sending thoughts and prayers is just a way to pretend you’re contributing without actually planning to do anything substantive to solve the problem. It’s like giving it a few minutes of thought and then moving on. And don’t get me started on politicians who use this phrase. Whenever I hear a politician say they’re sending thoughts and prayers, it’s clear to me that their time in office has elapsed. They’re just demonstrating their inability to be proactive and motivated to find real solutions. We need leaders who do more than offer condolences—we need action and change.
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Lauren Gropert doesn’t want to give up her 15 minutes of infamy. That’s why she’s decided to be a carpetbagger and move into Ken Buck’s district. The rules there are much, much looser than they are here. Residency in the district should be mandatory, and if the Mile High Airhead doesn’t want to relocate, then she shouldn’t run. She’s afraid of losing.
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