That does it, I’m betting on Transparency next Sunday!

I’m probably the kookiest harness horse better in the world. I’ll bet on a horse’s name, I’ll bet on a horse’s color, I’ll bet on a horse that dropped two pounds of manure before the start of the race. And once I start betting on a horse, I’ll keep dropping coin on that stud race after race.

And right now, the horse I’m looking at is called Transparency. What do I know about this horse Transparency? Not much. At least not yet. He raced in the sixth at Saratoga Harness last Sunday, and although one of the top drivers at the track – Brett Beckwith – was in the bike, Transparency went off at 20-1 odds.

And you’re thinking, “So? Big deal. What makes him different than any other horse out there?”

Well, it’s hard for me to show this on a copyrighted video, so you’ll just have to work with still shots. Take a look. Transparency is horse #2. Seems to have gotten off to a medium start.

So they make their way around the first turn, and Transparency is stuck in the rear of the pack, behind #5 Blue Loou, piloted by Wally Hennessy. Okay. Nothing unusual here.

But as the horses finish their way around the turn … Transparency seems to fancy a snack. And by snack, I mean that as he fell behind Hennessy, he took a chomp out of Hennessy’s shoulder.

Seriously. The horse bit the driver.

Yeah, I know, I’m working off screenshots … but the horse reached out and gnawed on Hennessy’s shoulder like it was a bat of oats. Immediately the horse was pulled back to the end of the race, and eventually finished sixth out of seven horses for that race, while Blue Lou came in fifth.

Look, I have seen some wacky stuff in horse racing before … I’ve seen harness horses just simply run off the track in the middle of the race like they were, “Nah, I’m done.” I’ve seen horses with names like Bofa Deez Nutz get entered in races like it’s a wink-wink nod-nod to the people in the know.

But I have never seen a horse go full Armie Hammer on someone else in the middle of a race.

If you want to see the full race, go to the Saratoga Harness website linked below, pull up the sixth race from Sunday, September 28, and watch for yourself.

Race Replays

And I’ll tell you right now. Next time that horse gets on the track …

I’m putting $20 on his nose to win.

Who knows? He might cross the finish line by the skin of his teeth.

Yes, you saw what I did there. 😀