Admit it. You love it when the party of family values and good Christian rules is caught not only breaking those rules, but then trying to twist out of these scandals like a Cirque du Soleil gymnast.
Years ago, it was Colorado representative Lauren Boebert letting her boyfriend fondle her foobs in a Denver theater.
And before that, it was South Carolina governor Mark Sanford claiming he was away on a hike through the Appalachian Trail, which was code for him flying to Argentina and jumping in bed with his mistress.
But yeah, remind me once again how Bill Clinton got impeached for a blowjob.
So the latest scandal comes from former South Dakota governor and former Trump ICE goonleader Kristi Noem. You know, the one who shot her puppy and then bragged about it in an autobiography.
It turns out that while Kristi Noem was directing her ICE goosesteppers to snatch innocent people off the streets, and then turning a blind eye when those same goosesteppers murdered Renee Good and Alex Pretti in cold blood …
While all that was happening …
Her husband Bryon was back home … dressed like this.
Yep. Apparently Bryon Noem had a fetish where he dressed up as a woman – including wearing fake boobs that arguably say GOODYEAR on the nipples – and chatted online with other fetishists.
Of course, MAGA talking heads are trying their best to spin this into something different. Case in point – Megyn Kelly, the PRIDE of Bethlehem High School and of Albany Law School (blecch), explained on her podcast that Bryon Noem’s fetish gave Kristi Noem the right to escape her marriage and sleep with former Trump aide Corey Lewandowski. Yep. She’s defending Kristi Noem having an extramarital affair because Bryon Noem is wearing breasketballs.
Yeah, Megyn Kelly is a swine. Exhibit #35, Your Honor.
But here’s what really makes me angry. This infuriates me.
This is just another example of suggesting that anyone who wishes to express themselves in a different way – whether they be gay, bi, or trans – are treated as deviants and perverts. And they’re mocked. They’re mocked as barely equating sub-humans. “Oh, don’t go near that person,” they’ll whisper. “I heard he likes to wear women’s clothing. He probably goes into women’s restrooms looking for little girls to molest.”
Yeah. The same insults that follow the “All blacks are …” or “All Muslims are …” or “All gay people are … ”
Do you know that there are people in this world who are doctors and lawyers and social workers and construction workers and food service workers and comedians and parents and siblings … who are also gay, or bi, or trans, or non-binary? You know what I call them?
Human beings.
And what Bryon Noem did here … and what the MAGA chuds are trying to spin away from … is that Noem is essentially MOCKING and DENIGRATING a specific group of people. He’s performing 21st-century minstrelsy. He’s doing a head-bonnet war dance while patting his lips and shouting “Oo oo oo oo.”
He’s glorifying what he feels is the only worthy description, in his mind, of trans people. That their only raison d’etre in this world is as fetish sex objects, and that’s it. To Bryon Noem, trans people should only exist on PornHub and nowhere else. While he cavorts on videos with enough makeup to put Mary Kay in the black.
The scandal isn’t that Bryon Noem performs in these fetish videos.
The scandal is that Bryon Noem’s appearances gives him a vulgar, reprehensible and disgusting opinion of an entire population.
Don’t give me this shit about Christian morality and family values.
Not when the Noems are either shooting puppies, allowing ICE to terrorize entire cities, or cosplaying in a wardrobe that would make Dolly Parton look like a member of the IBTC.
And as for Megyn Kelly … this is a woman who still defends Jeffrey Epstein’s actions.
So she can charitably fuck all the way off.
Chuck The Writer 