Yeah, there was no way I was going to stay away from this.
While everyone else who posted responses on my blog about whether or not Mayhem cheated to win the most recent Elbo Room trivia tournament, or whether there was any impropriety in one of their members also working on the Elbo Room staff, let me state right now.
You’re all nuts.
Mayhem didn’t cheat. Mayhem just has some smart guys on the squad, and on the game-changing question that they got right and both Street Academy and Woo Hoo a Go Go got wrong last time – what NFL team scored the most points in a 21st century Super Bowl game – Kramer (one of the guys on Mayhem) is a huge Oakland Raiders fan. In fact, his back leg actually has the Raiders logo tattooed on it. So sure, he’s going to remember that Tampa Bay scored on the Raiders almost at will, and he wrote down the correct answer – Tampa Bay – and that was it.
That being said, this week is the start of a brand new 16-week trivia tournament at Elbo Room, and I was ready for a new round of fun. Returning teams included Mayhem (who for some reason rebranded themselves as “Wehrmacht”), the Wooks (who rebranded themselves as the “Super Winners”), as well as perennials Woo Hoo a Go Go and Clay Aiken’s Skid Marks. (NOTE: Due to a request from my higher-ups regarding their team name, from now on that team will be branded in this blog as the “Skid Marks,” and you can assume I refer to the rubber imprints left on the highway when someone slams on the brakes to avoid a crash).
Questions were decent, but I burned off my two skips in the early round – I had no idea what state produced snowboarder Shaun White (no idea it was California), and I second-guessed myself in not being sure that Reese Witherspoon provided the voice of the main character in Monsters vs. Aliens (she did).
But I did nail the correct answers on the newspaper cartoon with the adventures of high schoolers Jeremy and Hector (Zits), the state whose town gave its name to the sweet Vidalia onion (Georgia), and who flew the spaceship with the call sign Red Five (Luke Skywalker).
The triple bonus involved a three-part Baldwin Brothers question, as to which Baldwin brothers starred in The Usual Suspects, The Departed, and Trees Lounge. No freakin’ clue. I wrote Alec Baldwin, Alec Baldwin, Alec Baldwin and handed it in – figuring I’ll take the easy eight points for getting one right, and praying I didn’t pick the one Baldwin brother that wasn’t in any of those three films. Stephen Baldwin was in The Usual Suspects, Alec Baldwin was in The Departed, and it was Daniel Baldwin in Trees Lounge. So that was an easy and safe 8 points right there.
But without any skips left, I fumbled on the 19th question, as to what state produced skier Lindsey Vonn. I don’t know, I’m looking at the TVs behind the bar at Elbo Room, and all they’re showing are snowboarders. And look, there’s Hannah Teter doing serious snowboard flips and jumps. Oh wait. Lindsey Vonn. The skier with the shin problem. Out of skips. 1-in-50 chance. I wrote Vermont and handed it in, knowing full well it was wrong.
Answer was Minnesota.
So at this point I’m in 5th place with 88 points, looking up at Wehrmacht (96), a team that plays Tuesday night at Bombers called The Nature of Play (104), Woo Hoo a Go Go (106) and the Skidmarks (116). Final category was autobiographies, I had nothing to lose, I pushed in all my chips.
“What First Lady, while working as an editor for a publishing company, wrote the foreword to Michael Jackson’s book Moonwalker?”
I already was finishing the word “Onassis” before General James finished the question. I now had to hope that the four teams above me would have some stumbles.
Skidmarks and Woo Hoo bet plenty, and they got Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis.
The Nature of Play, however, only bet 40 points, so even though they got the answer right (Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis), I was able to leapfrog them in the score.
As for Mayhem – er – Wehrmacht, they bet it all – but they said Laura Bush.
So that got Street Academy third place and one playoff point to start off the new tournament. The Skidmarks picked up 5 points, while Woo Hoo a Go Go got their customary second place quota of 3 playoff points.
General James announced that the finals of the Elbo Room Trivia Tournament will be held on June 3, so I’m blocking out my calendar for that day. He also said that due to teams not showing up for months and then appearing at the finals, as if they had enough points and were just waiting for the finals to arrive, he was instituting a 75% attendance rate for teams competing in the tournament.
So after one week, here are the standings. There’s a new column called “attendance,” in which teams that show up each week receive a black star. Twelve black stars earn you a white star, meaning you have fulfilled attendance requirements. Just trying to make this easy for everybody.
| Trivia Team | Points | Totals | Attendance | |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Skidmarks | 5 | 5 | ★ |
| 2 | Woo Hoo a Go Go | 3 | 3 | ★ |
| 3 | Street Academy | 1 | 1 | ★ |
| T-4 | The Bears | ★ | ||
| T-4 | The Super Winners | ★ | ||
| T-4 | The Nature of Play | ★ | ||
| T-4 | Team Liz | ★ | ||
| T-4 | Wehrmacht | ★ |
So another trivia tournament begins.
Chuck The Writer 
Mayhem was considerate enough to rename their team ’cause they knew the boos would be louder than yours.
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That’s not “boo,” that’s “Whoooo!!!!!!”
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wait, what? first place? what? what does that mean? did we break it?
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Chuck- As for any “not showing up again” claims made, let me just say, it’s difficult to be principled when there’s so much joy to be had in defeating teams like yourself.
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That’s okay… bring it on… There’s no money for coming in second place in the tournament this time…
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Just to keep the record straight, Woo Hoo did get the Tampa Bay question right in the finals. Actually two of our members had the answer.
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