What’s in a name? Tell me…

Believe me, I wish I knew.  Pardon my liberal snatching of Shakespeare’s soliloquy, but right now I wish I could come up with a personalized name for my new 2006 Chevrolet Cobalt SS car.

I’ve rattled off dozens of names, most of which were followed up with the word “Nah…”  Or the words “That won’t work.”  Or the words “That would work if I was driving a…”

Pleased to meet you... won't you guess my name? Photo by Chuck Miller.

And many of my friends and readers have offered their own suggestions.  The suggestions have ranged from ironic to salacious, from goofy to genuine.

I can tell you right now, although there are plenty of names I will consider for this ride, there are plenty that are off the table and are not part of the discussion.  I will not name the car with a person’s proper name; I don’t need anyone griping at me because they think there’s some ulterior motive for naming my car after their friend or their ex or their nemesis.  I’m not going to name this after a science fiction spaceship – I’m not driving an Enterprise or a TARDIS or a Liberator or an Argo or a Yamato.  Just imagine the fear of every driver on the New York State Thruway if I launched a Wave Motion Gun out of the front grille of this bad boy.

That being said, after careful consideration, I have narrowed down the field of automotive sobriquets to the following choices:

  • The Black Dragon.  My writing friend / editor Catherine came up with this one.  It pays homage to my car’s color and to one of my favorite rock bands.
  • The Blackbird. Dan (D357) offered this nickname.  He thought it was more fitting as a Beatles reference, but I sorta like it as a reference to the SR-71 spy plane.
  • The Sonicar. This actually goes back to a fiction fantasy series I wrote as a child; the Sonicar was a miniaturized flying car that was piloted by a super-tiny secret agent.
  • The Mach 27. Another mixed homage – “Mach” being the name of Speed Racer’s sportscar (the Mach V) and 27 being the atomic number for cobalt.
  • The Midnight Ride. Reader Roz sent me a variation on this title – she had it as the “Midnight Express,” but since that name evokes an image of a Southern pro wrestling team AND a movie about escaping a Turkish prison, I decided to adjust the name slightly.  Plus, wasn’t “Midnight Ride” an early Styx song?
  • The Vindicator. Don’t know where I got this name.  Don’t care.  The name reminds me of all the crap I went through in my life to get to where I am today, still standing despite those who would try to hurt me and make me feel small – that’s vindication every day.
  • The Frostheave. Hey, I live in the Northeast, where Nor’easters and frost heaves and potholes make for a fun driving experience.  Plus, it pays tribute to the old Vermont Frost Heaves minor league pro basketball team.
  • Strick. This goes against my naming the car after a person, but I’m making an exception for The Franchise, John Strickland.

See, here’s my problem.  I can’t keep calling the new car “the new car.”  At some point in time the new car is going to develop a personality – or as much of a personality as a naturally aspirated 2.4 liter ECOTEC engine can provide.

So I’m officially turning to you, my dear readers.  Using the parameters above – no personal names, no spaceship names, keep it clean, something that relates to me or to my life – are there any of the above eight names that you think would be perfect for my car?  Or do you think there’s a ninth name out there that would work well for this vehicle?

The floor is now open for your suggestions.  Keep it clean, keep it inventive.  Tell me why you like a certain choice; tell me why you don’t like another choice.  And based on all these suggestions, I’ll whittle the choices down.  And maybe add some new ones if someone comes up with a really good name.

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