Sweet smoked meats for a holiday treat

One of my annual holiday traditions encompasses the social media site reddit and its “Secret Santa” gift exchange.  Every year, over 150,000 redditors participate in this swapping of holiday gifts.  Person A sends a gift to Person B, who in turn sends a different gift to Person C, and so on and so forth.

Besides, it’s a nice way for me to share the holiday spirit.  Do something nice for someone.  Part of the “Chucksmas” tradition, shall we say.

So last week, all the Santas who signed up at r/secretsanta were “matched” with their gifties.  And my giftie… hmm… his online biography seems rather interesting, nothing completely stands out, husband, father, dog owner, seems to be an all-around nice guy…

Then I noticed one of my giftie’s hobbies.  He likes to smoke meats.

And no, I don’t mean he wraps some pastrami around a blunt.

And the minute I saw that my giftie liked to smoke meats, I instantly had a fantastic idea for a gift.

All the way from South Central Pennsylvania.

A gift box of Seltzer’s Smokehouse Meats.

A longtime favorite and staple of the Pennsylvania Dutch diet, Seltzer’s bolognas are delicious and satisfying.  And Seltzer’s delivers.  And not just by horse and buggy – I mean that they deliver around the country.

Okay.  After confirming with Seltzer’s that they can ship to my giftie in plenty of time (so long as I used Santa’s special reindeer, FedEx 2d Day Air), I put together a Pennsylvania Dutch smorgasbord for the holidays.  Ooh, look, a gift box of Seltzer’s bologna.  Oh, they have cured bacon, too?  Yes, please.  And Scrapple?  John E. Martin and Sons brand?  Definitely.  And for dessert, a nice tasty shoo-fly pie.

Trust me, this couldn’t get more Amish if I had the food delivered by Lebanon Levi and his Amish Mafia.

And last night, when I was checking my reddit account…

Reddit informed me that my giftie received his Christmas present.

And to say that he liked the gifts is like saying that water is wet.

He loved them.  Posted pictures of the gifts and his happy family eating up the Scrapple and the shoofly pie.

And that felt really, really good.  It’s nice when you can find the perfect gift for someone, and thanks to modern technology, you can share a regional delicacy and no longer make it totally “regional.”

Yeah, this was a fun Secret Santa 2016.

Now there’s only one loose end to tie up.

Somewhere in the world, there’s a Secret Santa who picked up my name out of the hat.

And I’m curious to see … what Santa thinks of me.