The Definition of Covfefe

Apparently, a lot has happened while I slept last night.

And it starts … once again … with a Twitter message from President Donald Trump.  Take a gander at this.

There it is.  Covfefe.  This post stayed up all night, and was finally removed in the early morning, so that’s why you have a screen shot here.  That, and I don’t normally follow Donald Trump’s Twitter feed.

It seems as if Trump’s tiny fingers tried to use their kung-fu grip (you know, the one that is best suited for grabbing women by the pussy) to type the word “coverage,” and somehow he either got distracted by a TV commercial for Viagra, and his fingers slipped into keying in a new word.  A typo for the ages.  Covfefe.

Well, isn’t that all snug and cozy.

But a typo from “coverage” to “covfefe” isn’t that funny.  The fact that the typo was left up on his Twitter feed for several hours – and became an instant viral meme overnight – just adds to the fun.  And we all know how much Trump loves to tweet.  Heck, if he could divorce Melania and marry his Twitter account, he’d be happier than a real estate developer foreclosing properties on Christmas Eve.  Oh wait… 😀

So let’s assume that Trump actually meant to type the word “covfefe” into his Twitter feed.  Perhaps he is trying to coin a new phrase.  I mean, “COVFEFE!” may have been the rallying cry during the Bowling Green Massacre, for all I know.  Or perhaps that’s the name of his new curse word every time he sees Alec Baldwin on Saturday Night Live.  Maybe covfefe is the code word for Jared Kushner’s Russian operations.  Or it’s the term that was written on Page 10 of Jeannine Pirro’s most recent public speech.

Covfefe.  And somewhere in that dark night, Dan Quayle is smiling because he is no longer the highest ranking elected official with an embarrassing lack of spelling acumen.

Let us parse out the etymology of this new Trumpism.  Covfefe.  “Cove-FEE-fee.”  Or maybe it’s “COVE-feh-fee.”  Gotta put the empHAsis on the correct sylLAble.  Maybe it’s an old Yiddish word.  Oy gevalt, my covfefe is so meshuggah!

Perhaps Trump was playing Scrabble while tweeting, and these were all the tiles left on his tray.  I mean, if he played it properly – found a way to sneak the V onto a triple letter score – he could probably win the game.  Then again, I kinda imagine Donald Trump as more of a Candy Land aficionado.  That’s more of his speed.

Another thought?  Maybe this is a big fat redirection.  Talking about “Covfefe” instead of the real issues in our country – the demolition of health care, the robbery of our natural resources, all of that – might be a calculated distraction.  But then again, that would assume that we’re dealing with a calculating President and not one that gets cheesed off whenever anyone jokes about him.

But you came to this blog, based on the headline “The Definition of Covfefe,” and I don’t want to disappoint you.  So here’s the definition of Covfefe.

Covfefe (noun) The feeling when a person misinterprets satire or comedy as an insult or threat, and immediately attacks the individual presenting the satire or comedy.  Also see “thin-skinned,” “hyper-sensitive,” “over-react,” “passive-aggressive,” “touchy.”  Most often appears in people who have a high opinion of themselves, mostly those with a superiority complex or a Napoleonic complex.

Then again, do I know anybody who would fit that description?  Anybody who I’ve dealt with in the past few months who was so covfefe to me?  Hmm… I know it’ll come to me at some point in time…

But for now, I’ll leave you with this new track from 70’s rock stars Todd Rundgren and Steely Dan’s Donald Fagen… perhaps in this little melody, you too can appreciate the efforts of our tweeting President in this age of Covfefe.

Have a great day everybody, and don’t let any covfefe people ruin your morning!