In our lives, there are songs that, if I’m being generous, are just plain awful. The composition. The melody. The lyrics. All of the above. These are the songs that you can’t get away from. These are songs that can be used as torture devices.
Which brings me to the subject of today’s blog post.
The most hated song in the whole wide world.
Well, first, we have to play the track whose melody inspired the most hated song in the world.
Let me introduce you to Country Yossi, a singer-songwriter who composes songs for children. And this track, “Little Kinderlach.” Now, the song itself is about how the “little kinderlach” – children – will help to bring the Messiah back to Earth.
And if you hear the song … you may recognize the melody in the song. It’ll come to you. Trust me on this.
Sounds familiar, doesn’t it?
It’s coming to you. Just a minute.
And then, in that minute, you immediately recognize the song.
And a feeling of nausea washes over you.
Bitter, awful nausea.
And chills run up and down your nervous system.
A pounding headache blasts through your temples.
Yeah. It’s this song.
I had to put my computer on mute to be able to write this blog post.
Yeah, the 1-877-Kars-4-Kids song is truly annoying. And it’s become – for worse or for worse – a punchline in pop culture.
Yeah, even John Oliver has taken a swing at this charity.
Oh, he punchlined them not once … but twice.
But what you may not know is that the Kars 4 Kids charity is kinda skeevy to begin with. The charity uses the sale of your cars – er, kars – to fund sleepaway camps in the Catskills for Jewish children. Whether or not you want to donate to Kars 4 Kids – or their parent company, Oorah – that’s for you to decide. Not me.
But, sweet Lord, that song. Ugh. Seriously, ugh.
I don’t even think you can do a suitable remix that would make this song less stenchy.
Nope. Still stinks.
But, yeah, you can have all the Baby Shark do do do-do do-do songs you want. Just please, please, somebody find a way to teach these kids how to drive so they can have their own kars.
Or, if nothing else, can someone digitally find a way to make this song less nerve-grating? I mean, some enterprising young soul was able to create a palatable dance mix out of an infomercial for a kitchen dicing-and-slicing instrument.
Whatever it takes, I guess. But as for the charity itself …
Watch this video before you make any decisions about donating to them.
Okay? We good? All right. Have a great day, everyone.
Okay, time to close down the blog post. Save. File. Posted. Good. Okay, now off to do other things.
Oh, nuts. Now the damn song’s stuck in my brain cells.
Residual damage, I guess.