By: Chuck Miller
Having Fun

Horny walruses and raunchy senior citizen rappers … Rue Britannia, my ass!

What’s the best way to ring in the year 2023? Champagne? Confetti? Paper horns? Off-key performances of Auld Lang Syne?

Oh, this has them all beat. And I do mean “beat.”

So here’s the deal. Somehow a walrus wound up on the beach in Scarborough, England. Now a walrus is not something one sees in Scarborough, England – maybe a walrus mustache, but not a real one with tusks and flippers.

Anyway, someone thought it would be a great idea to film the walrus.

And upon being filmed … the walrus did his best Johnny Wadd impersonation.

Holy turbo flipper, Batman.

This is the best way to start 2023. Have a walrus show his own special brand of “horizontal love” for all the viewers. This may be the best screwing of England since Brexit.

Hey, if that’s the walrus, does that mean his “safe word” is “goo goo ga joob?”

And this isn’t the raunchiest thing that came out of the United Kingdom in recent memory.

Let me introduce you to the Northern Boys. Three senior citizens whose rap record, “Party Time,” has become a left-field novelty hit. I don’t know what personal trauma these three guys went through, but whatever it was, it must have been epic.

This is a warning. The video is NOT SAFE FOR WORK. And that includes you watching that clip of the walrus polishing his pole earlier.

Yeah, this song’s getting played on my radio show about ten minutes from never. I play this song and the entire Mohawk Valley would get shut down by the FCC.

So, yeah, there’s some weird shit coming out of the United Kingdom. A place where nearly every newspaper has a topless girl on Page 3. Where highbrow comedy can include Monty Python’s Flying Circus and Jeeves & Wooster – as well as Benny Hill and The Best of Benny Hill.