“And here comes Harass!”

If you’re a fan of equestrian sports – whether thoroughbred racing or harness racing or steeplechase or dressage – you know that there are certain rules regarding a horse’s registered name.  All names must be submitted to the Jockey Club for approval; and the rules are simple.  You cannot have a horse’s name exceed eighteen letters (with spaces), you cannot copy an already registered horse’s name; the horse’s name must be reasonably simple for a track announcer’s pronunciations, and most of all – and I mean MOST OF ALL – you can’t have a horse’s name that would be misinterpreted as anything pornographic or offensive.

But sometimes a horse’s name gets past all that.  Such was the case of a stallion named “Hoof Hearted.” Yep, in November of 1989, a horse competed in the fourth race at Prairie Meadows with that name.

Okay, that was funny. Yeah, it was bathroom humor, but still, it was kinda funny.

So last Sunday, the eighth race at Gulfstream Park was just a normal, everyday thoroughbred race.

Except for the horse wearing the #6 silk.  It was a horse named Harass, and he stayed near the front of the pack the entire race, eventually finishing second and paying some decent odds.

But you have to hear the race call.  The announcer knew he had a golden opportunity to snag a notable two-minute race call, and he didn’t waste a single moment of this.  Click and laugh.

Okay, that was just absolutely funny. More bathroom humor, for sure.

And my thought was… Damn, I should have bet on that horse. Look at the payout for second place… Not that I’m trying to Harass anybody about it… but with my luck, Harass would have finished behind.  I’m not sure how well Harass would stack up to other competition.  Sometimes it’s hard to get past Harass, especially when trying to head for home.  Not sure I would have wanted to use the whip on Harass in the final moments, because next thing I know the horse could have bucked and I would have been thrown off Harass rather quickly.

Hee he he he he…