Of late, I’ve been watching more and more of MSNBC. I don’t know what it is … perhaps I’m looking for intelligent discourse on the day’s news, and the newscasters, anchorpeople and political pundits at MSNBC seem to fit my interests.
By 9:00 p.m., as I’m winding down my day, I’ve got Rachel Maddow on the TV. If I’m still awake, I’ll watch Lawrence O’Donnell or maybe even Brian Williams after that.
So, a day or so ago, Rachel Maddow opened her show with some commentary about our current political crisis.
Then, yesterday, one of my Facebook friends posted this little commentary from a conservative pundit named Rick Wiles. Wiles, who apparently hasn’t met a conspiracy theory he couldn’t adore, has suddenly claimed that MSNBC – and, in particular, Rachel Maddow – had broadcast a call to arms, and that Maddow was planning on storming the White House, dragging the President out of the building and … well …it’s best that you see what I’m talking about here.
Yeah, this guy’s so nuts he should have a walking stick, a top hat and a monocle. I mean, you watch Rachel Maddow’s commentary and you automatically think this is a manifesto for an invasion that wouldn’t even make the second half of a Steven Seagal direct-to-video quickie film?
And Rachel Maddow’s the ringleader? This is a woman who once got super-giddy about composing a New York Times crossword puzzle, for God’s sakes.
This guy Wiles needs to lay off the conspiracy theories. Elvis Presley is dead. Paul McCartney is alive. We walked on the surface of the moon.
But what if … just for the sake of argument … Rachel Maddow suddenly asserts some deeply pent up frustration over this, that and the other thing, and we wake up the next morning and we’re now greeted with President Rachel Maddow?
Am I ready for this?
Well, let’s say, for the sake of speculative fiction, we do have President Rachel Maddow. A President must have a Vice President. I’m betting she picks MSNBC host Ari Melber. Former lawyer, knows his way around the DC beltway, and he could even offer his “Fallback Fridays” to the political world.
Now for a cabinet. I postulate that if we’re still picking from Maddow’s political base – MSNBC – she needs to hire Secretary of State Joe Scarborough, Secretary of the Interior Chris Matthews, Secretary of Education Chris Hayes, Secretary of Education Brian Williams, and Secretary of the Department of Homeland Security Joy Reid.
This crew needs a good solid Chief of Staff. I’m sure Andrea Mitchell will get this group in line.
We’re going to need a Press Secretary. Someone who’se trustworthy and can get to the bottom of things without castigating the media at the same time. Guess what, Kris Jansing … you’re tapped as the new Press Secretary.
Trust me … this could be fun.
And if there’s any chatter about, “well, the President should be worried about Rachel Maddow,” let me tell you.
Of all the MSNBC shows out there, Rachel Maddow is not the MSNBC representative you should worry about.
Because there’s this other MSNBC show that might be more … shall we say … appropriate.
They still air episodes of the series late at night, and they’re great shows for those midnight insomnia bouts.
Perhaps you’ve heard of it … a show called “Lockup”?
Just sayin’ is all… 😀