The Photocopier named “Monica Lewinsky”

My Facebook friend Katie works at Spotlight Newspapers, and she’s doing a decent job there.

Recently, though, she posted a Facebook message that had me laughing off my chair.

Let me explain.

At some point in time, Katie named all the photocopiers in her office.  This way, she could direct which photocopier was the best one to print out her documents.

I’m not going to ask why she named her photocopies “Humpty Dumpty” or “Rico Suave” or “Claire” – unless she’s referencing Digital Underground, Gerardo and Gilbert O’Sullivan, respectively…

But she actually named one of her photocopier / printers “Monica Lewinsky.”


Now I’m trying to figure this out.

Is it because when it needs repairs, you have to get down on your knees to service it?

Is it because it’s a small copier and if you’re not careful, you might (Linda) Tripp over it?

Is it instead of the normal colors of beige or black, this printer is colored (im)peach?

Is it because there’s a possible toner leak and if you handle it the wrong way, you’ll get toner all over your blue dress?

So I asked Katie about it.  Apparently the reason for naming the copier “Monica Lewinsky” was more of a slip of a tongue than … shall we say … slips of the tongue.  Listen, I don’t get to use these jokes very often, let me use them now.

She explained that the photocopier is an old “Konica Minolta” unit, and somehow over time, “Konica Minolta” mondegreened into “Monica Lewinsky.”

Sure.  THAT explains everything.  That’s about as clear as milk.  Or, more realistically, as clear as white water.

Hey, if you want to name your photocopier “Monica Lewinsky,” have at it.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go work on some construction projects.

Now where did I put my power drill “Stormy Daniels”?